So I just got out of the hospital:

I have been in the hospital since Thursday morning. Got out today. I seem to be determined to slowly kill myself just like my mom did. I have asthma, COPD, who knows? I could even have emphysema. I am tracking to die just like my mom did and at exactly the same age. I have got to get a handle on this NOW!!!!

What I gotta do:

I have to quit smoking once and for all and for good to start. I have to lose weight. I have to get healthy both physically AND mentally. Frankly, if I don’t get healthy mentally, I will never be able to get healthy physically and vice versa, I guess. Any suggestions out there for me? Clearly the usually motivating factors are not working for me. Factors like wanting to be here for when my kids and grandkids are grown ups. To be fair, Mike is already grown up, but I do want to be around when Katie is grown and I want to see Mike’s son Ryan grow up, too.

How do I do this???

Please someone give me some suggestions. I really need it. Please give me the motivation to do this everyone. I really need your help.